What Cancer Has Taught Me

What I Have Learned From The Cancer-When I was diagnosed with breast cancer
last March, I was overwhelmed but not totally surprised as they had found a
lump. But I couldn't understand why, after I have already suffered so much,
God would allow a deadly diseases like cancer to enter my life. However,
after a little more than a year of living with cancer that has never been,
or never will be, treated, I have learned a few things.

I have really learned that, just because I have symptoms, doesn't mean that
I actually have the disease. When Jesus died on the cross, He also took our
diseases. Which includes cancer or any other affliction that has, or is
trying to, come on me. Right now, I am in a battle not to give in to cancer
symptoms. But they are just symptoms and will eventually go away if I don't
slack off.

I have learned to have a deeper trust in God. I have always had a fairly
deep trust in God. I have had to because, since the stroke and following
complication, no human doctor can anything to help me. Only Dr. Jesus.
However, since I was diagnosed with cancer, and since they decided not to
treat the cancer, my trust in God has become even stronger. It has to be.
This is a matter of life or death, not just of walking and talking. Most
days, I pray and ask God to help me to trust Him the way I need to right
now.

Somewhat related, I have learned to have a more intimate relationship with
God. My relationship with the Lord has always been quite intimate. Being
alone so much of time, I have learned to have conversations (in my mind)
with the Lord as if I were chit-chatting with a human friend. Being
diagnosed with cancer only has made our relationship even closer. At first,
out of sheer desperation, I was driven to seek God and His promises. I am
somewhat calmer now but I am still spending even more time with God and His
promises in the Bible than before.

I have learned to take one day. Before I was diagnosed with cancer, I was
always focused on the future and when my miracle will take place. Now,
though, I just take one day, sometimes only a few hours, at at a time. I try
not to think about the future, even the next day. It usually just leads to
fretting about things that are out of my control, if not downright
depression. Instead, before going sleep, each night, I thank God for getting
me through another day with cancer symptoms that weren't too bad.

Finally, I have learned to have an eternal perspective on everything. Prior
to the cancer, I was primarily focused on receiving my healing in this life
and, even though I knew eternity will be wonderful, I never thought about it
too often. However, the cancer diagnosis kind of pulled me up short. The
word cancer brings the thought of death to the mind. And especially when
they decided not to treat the cancer. I never doubted that I would be healed
in this life but, now, I understand more clearly that God is in control of
my life and, whatever happens will be in my best interest. For me, it is now
pretty much "whatever God". Another way I now have an eternal perspective
is, when something upsets me, I often ask myself, "How important is this in
the light of eternity?". Admittedly, I sometimes wonder why I have to suffer
so much but, when I have an eternal perspective, it doesn't really matter.

Living with cancer has not been a whole lot of fun. But I have  to admit
that I have learned some things that I may not have learned otherwise.