Blog Time

Blog Time-I am sitting here with absolutely no idea what to write in this
blog. The Holy Spirit told me it would come as I start writing but, so far,
nothing. But, now, the title Hope In God popped into my mind.

Ever since becoming a Christian, I have had no choice but hope in God. At
the time of my salvation, I was in a really bad state. I couldn't move,
couldn't speak and with no hope of ever recovering. However, along with
salvation, came the certain hope that I would be restored to the health that
I had before the stroke. Perhaps even better. I have clung to that hope
throughout many long, tedious years and many dark, dismal days.

Last March, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. That was overwhelming, to
say the least. After getting over the initial emotional outburst, I resolved
to do whatever the doctors suggested, even though I dreaded those nasty
treatments. However, the doctors couldn't seem to decide how to treat the
cancer as it had already been determined that I was not strong enough for
surgery. I believe that all this was orchestrated by God in order that I
would depend solely on Him rather than doctors. Don't get me wrong. I'm not
saying that Christians should not see doctors. All I am saying is that mine
is a unique situation. I was already hoping solely on God for my healing and
the cancer is just part of my total healing. In June, another scan showed
that the cancer had spread. Since then, I have been pretty much left alone.
No more tests and no nasty treatments.

But that suits me just fine. Now I can focus solely on God. I am stuffing
myself full of scriptures. On cancer, healing in general and other topics
such as courage , encouragement, comfort, etc. (Good old Google). At the
moment, I am battling not to give in to symptoms. They haven't been too
severe and I am believing that they are getting better. I have chosen not to
talk about the symptoms for three reasons. First, I think that, if I keep
talking about the symptoms, it won't be long before I start to give in to
them. Secondly, talking about the symptoms, or any other problem, just
glorifies the devil. But I want to glorify God, not him. Thirdly, I find it
rather annoying when other people constantly talk to me about their
ailments. I am determined not to do that to other people.

There are a couple of other ways that I hope in God. One is in salvation. For other friends and relatives but especially my grown-up kids, Donovan and Heidi. Once I even told God that I would even be willing to stay this way if He would save my kids. Of course, bargaining with God never works but I tried it anyway. Perhaps my greatest desire, even more than my healing, is to see Donovan and Heidi walking with the Lord. It may not look too promising right now but I have confident hope in God that it is just a matter of time.

But my greatest hope in God is Heaven. Knowing that what awaits me after this life is over is peace and no more suffering , makes me almost long for death. Almost but not quite. This is the thought that keeps me fighting for life in this world. If I were to die right now, it would be wonderful for me but I would go to Heaven alone. However, if I am healed before I take my last breath, hopefully, plenty of people will be ready to go to Heaven. There is no guarantee that my healing will prompt a lot of people to get saved. But there is a better chance than if I went right away. Hell scares me and I really don't want anybody to go there.

Considering I didn't know what to write about, I ended up writing up quite a bit. I can always count on the Holy Spirit to come up with something. Even if it is not until I start writing.