What Keeps Me Going

 -Sometimes, when I am resting in bed, I wonder how on earth I have lasted this long and still be relatively sane. The obvious answer is nothing but the grace of God. Sometimes, people will say to me that they couldn't do what I am doing. Of course, they couldn't because they haven't been called to it. But, if they had been,the grace would be there to help them to get through it. God will never ask us to do something and not provide the grace for it.
          However, I suspect that there are a couple of other things that are helping me to "keep on keeping on", so to speak. The first one is hope. We all need hope. When I first became a Christian, like most new Christians, I had a lot of zeal without much knowledge and I honestly believed that God would zap me and I would be the same as before. But, as the years have gone by, much of of the zeal has turned to plodding endurance and I am no longer expecting God to zap me at any moment. Though I still believe that it is possible. Anything is possible with God. Over the years my hope may have dimmed a little but it is still there. I am still sure that I will have a better life. Not just in Heaven but in this world as well.
            The second thing that helps to keep me going may sound a bit funny but I believe that it is my stubborn personality. Years ago I was repenting to God for my stubborn streak and He surprised me by saying that a stubborn streak is not necessarily a bad thing. It just depends how it is used. I do know that if I wasn't so stubborn, or determined, I would have caved in long ago. Who knows where I would be. Perhaps in a mental hospital or even dead. But, for me, it is very simple. God said it, I believe it and I am too ornery to give up!