What I need

What I Need-One day, I was thinking of things, or qualities, that I need to
endure a really, really difficult situation.

The most important thing that I need  is a thorough, and I do mean thorough,
knowledge of the promises of God in the Bible. I need to keep storing up the
promises for healing in the Bible until they become visible in my body.
While I do concentrate more on healing , I also know that I need to know the
rest of the Bible well. So those promises are there if or when I need them.
But other parts of Bible are important as well. The historical passages are
good examples of what to not do in certain situations.There are sections
that inform us how to live out the Christian life. I regularly read Psalms
as I find they make me feel better when I feel down. I have been reading the
Bible daily for years and, almost everyday, I am still discovering something
new. No matter how many times I have read a passage.

I also need to remain faithful to God through the ups and downs and twists
and turns of my life. This is relatively easy for me, though, simply because
I don't have a lot of "wonderful" things trying to pull me this way, pull me
that way and away from God.

I need to be steadfast year after year. I have a goal in sight and I need to
have a firm resolution to achieve that goal. Hand in hand with
steadfastness, goes perseverance. Perseverance keeps me going through the
difficulties and delays. At times, I literally have to say to myself, in my
mind of course, "I won't give up. I won't! I won't!". Again , though, I not
sure I have a choice when it comes to perservering. Afterall, the
alternative is even less appealing than my present life.

I admit it. I have a stubborn streak. But I know that this stubborn streak
is helping me to stick with it. Being a bit stubborn can be to to my
advantage when it makes me determined to do what needs to done. But it can
also be a disadvantage when I use it against other people which,
unfortunately, I do at times.

I need patience. Patience to let God work out my healing in His way and His
time. I have to admit that, lately, my patience has been wearing a bit thin
and God and I have had a few "discussions" about it. Actually, more me
griping and Him patiently listening while I "blow off steam" and then carry
on. But, living in Long-term Care also requires patience. With 30 other
people and minimal staff, somebody is always going to be waiting for
something.

It takes courage just to face each day in this condition and in this place.
Many mornings, I don't feel like I have the courage to face another day but,
somehow, God gets me through it. Lately, my courage seems to be faltering a
bit but, I know that God won't let it fail entirely.

So, yes, there are some qualities that I need to get through what I have to
go through. However, I believe that God puts in us whatever we need to go
through whatever we have to go through. So, any qualities that I may have
that are helping me to cope, I know were all put there by God to make sure
that His purpose for me is fulfilled.