Amazing-One day, I idly wondering what I would write about in my next blog.
It seems like I have already written about everything that I can possibly
write about. I am not even sure when or how the word "amazing" can into my
mind but, when it did, I thought that it was something I could write about.
Especially with help from the Holy Spirit. First, though, I looked up the
meaning of "amazing". Not that I don't know but I just to see what
they said. The most common definition seems to "something that causes great
surprise, wonderment or astonishment".
Whenever I hear the word "amazing", I can't help thinking about God. Just
that there is really a God is, to me, totally amazing. Call it great
surprise. Call it wonderment. Call it astonishment. Call it anything you
want but on the day that I became a born-again Christian and really knew
that God was very real, I was totally flabbergasted. And, after 30+ years, I
still am. Quite often, even now, I catch myself "asking" God how He really
can be.
Amazing Grace. I love that old hymn. Even a lot of non-Christians know it.
But what they don't know is how very true it is . God's grace is amazing. I
know from experience that, if it wasn't for God's grace, there no way
I could keep on living the way I have been living year after year after
year. But, somehow, God gives me grace to endure whatever I have to endure.
I find it quite amazing that I am doing what I am doing. And all because of
God's amazing grace.
The mercy of God is just as amazing. I have heard mercy defined as not
getting what we deserve. I know that I depend on God's mercy a LOT. Because
of sheer frustration, too often I don't act the way I know that a Christian
should be acting,. But, instead of the rebuke that I deserve, I often feel
like God is wrapping His arms around me and giving me the comfort I need at
time. That is not to say that I never get rebuked but, because of God's
amazing mercy, not as often as I feel I deserve. Even when I am reading the
Bible, I am constantly amazed at all the times that God doesn't give people
what their actions probably deserve.
I have written so many blogs that I have trouble remembering what I have
already written about. It does, though, seem to me to me that, previously, I
wrote on the love of God so I will just touch on the amazing love of God. I
admit that I don't even begin to understand the depths of His love but I do
know that I any so thankful for that amazing love that doesn't change
whenever my mood does.
Not too long ago, somebody said that that I was an amazing lady. My first
thought was that she wouldn't think that if she had ever seen me in one of
my meltdown moments! Seriously, there is nothing whatsoever amazing about
me. I am just an ordinary woman who just happens live under circumstances
that have been orchestrated by an amazing God. The fact that I am "hanging
in there" has nothing, absolutely nothing to do with me. It has everything
to do with an amazing God with His amazing grace and mercy.
Of course, we often use the word "amazing" in situations that seem to have
no connection with God. But is that really true? I like to watch nature
shows. I always find it amazing how the animals have just the instincts they
need to survive in their particular environment. Those instincts were put
there by their Creator, our amazing God. There are a lot of beautiful places
in nature. All created by an amazing God. Sometimes, one hears about an
amazing singer, athlete or whatever. Certainly they have had to take the
time and make the effort to develop their abilities but those abilities were
first put in them by God. I suspect that a lot of what we call amazing in
this world has its roots in God.
Anyhow, to me, the word "amazing" makes me think of God. Most things make me start thinking about God simply because He is such a big part of my life.
Me
At the beloved/hated writing vessel
Tuesday, 29 December 2015
Tuesday, 22 December 2015
Christmas
Christmas-One day, the thought came to me that, if I am going to write about
Christmas, I had better do soon as Christmas is quickly sneaking up on us.
But, like I told God, I had no idea what to write about Christmas. I felt to
keep it simple and just write about the good and bad things about Christmas
for me at the present time, in my present condition.
So let's start with the good things about Christmas for me. By far, the best
thing about Christmas is what it means. Because I have been a Christian for
many years, it is easy to slip into taking Jesus for granted. So it is good,
everytime Christmas rolls around, to be reminded of the the precious gift
that God gave the world in giving us Jesus and the reason for it.
Another thing I love about Christmas is the music. There are some really
nice Christmas songs out there, as well as some pretty silly ones, but my
favorites are still the old carols. Before the stroke, I used to
just pay attention to the first verse but now I like to listen to the words
of the entire carol. I find it very uplifting.
Another Christmas best for me is the food. Especially the baking. We don't
get goodies like that. No doubt, a good thing or I would be looking like a
beached whale by now! Still, though, at Christmas, I thoroughly enjoy
indulging in stuff like that!
Christmas decorations are another aspect that I enjoy. This year, I had
absolutely no interest in Christmas. However, mostly for my "adopted"
grandkids, I decided I should put up a few decorations in my room. Amazingly,
though, ever since those decorations went up, my mood has changed and I am
looking forward to Christmas. They also have Long-term Care decorated really
nicely. I don't usually get out just to look at Christmas lights but I love to see
them as I go to and from church.
Something else that I really like about Christmas is the sense of community
at this time of year. With all the technology now, it seems like people are
spending less and less time together. So it is nice that, at Christmas,
there are functions that bring people together. Although, because of my
physical condition, I can't always take part in many of these functions, it is still
nice to see other people spending more time together.
However, I would not be honest if I didn't mention that Christmas is also a lonely, depressing, tedious time for me. I suspect that, for a lot of people, Christmas is not all that joyful. Life in Long-term Care is always lonely for everybody. But Christmas feels even lonelier. True, some people get visitors, a few even get to go out, but, for others, it is is just another day. I have been fortunate in that I have always had somebody to spend enough time with me to at least open gifts. Before my kids left home, they would spend every Christmas afternoon with me, opening gifts and visiting. Since then, there always was somebody. Except for one year. That year, I was so lonely. It has brought me to the conclusion that nobody should ever have to be alone. Last year was my best Christmas in years. I spent Christmas morning with my "adopted" family which made it feel much more Christmas.
Depression is something I often battle but, at Christmas, it is even more of a battle. This year, though, I have one thing that is helping. One of this nurses gave me a stocking that says, "Jesus is the reason for the season". When I am lying in bed and start feeling sorry for myself, I look at it and it puts things back in perspective for me.
Christmas, at least most times, is tedious for me. Because any visitors I get, don't come until afternoon or evening, Christmas morning is just like any other morning. I do enjoy my mornings. It is just that on Christmas it feels like I should be doing something else.
The very worst time for me, though, is the week between Christmas and New Year. All the pre-Christmas hustle and bustle is over and things settle back into my mundane routine. I don't get out much or get many visitors.
So, you see, Christmas is, for me, like the rest of my life. A combination of good and bad.
Christmas, I had better do soon as Christmas is quickly sneaking up on us.
But, like I told God, I had no idea what to write about Christmas. I felt to
keep it simple and just write about the good and bad things about Christmas
for me at the present time, in my present condition.
So let's start with the good things about Christmas for me. By far, the best
thing about Christmas is what it means. Because I have been a Christian for
many years, it is easy to slip into taking Jesus for granted. So it is good,
everytime Christmas rolls around, to be reminded of the the precious gift
that God gave the world in giving us Jesus and the reason for it.
Another thing I love about Christmas is the music. There are some really
nice Christmas songs out there, as well as some pretty silly ones, but my
favorites are still the old carols. Before the stroke, I used to
just pay attention to the first verse but now I like to listen to the words
of the entire carol. I find it very uplifting.
Another Christmas best for me is the food. Especially the baking. We don't
get goodies like that. No doubt, a good thing or I would be looking like a
beached whale by now! Still, though, at Christmas, I thoroughly enjoy
indulging in stuff like that!
Christmas decorations are another aspect that I enjoy. This year, I had
absolutely no interest in Christmas. However, mostly for my "adopted"
grandkids, I decided I should put up a few decorations in my room. Amazingly,
though, ever since those decorations went up, my mood has changed and I am
looking forward to Christmas. They also have Long-term Care decorated really
nicely. I don't usually get out just to look at Christmas lights but I love to see
them as I go to and from church.
Something else that I really like about Christmas is the sense of community
at this time of year. With all the technology now, it seems like people are
spending less and less time together. So it is nice that, at Christmas,
there are functions that bring people together. Although, because of my
physical condition, I can't always take part in many of these functions, it is still
nice to see other people spending more time together.
However, I would not be honest if I didn't mention that Christmas is also a lonely, depressing, tedious time for me. I suspect that, for a lot of people, Christmas is not all that joyful. Life in Long-term Care is always lonely for everybody. But Christmas feels even lonelier. True, some people get visitors, a few even get to go out, but, for others, it is is just another day. I have been fortunate in that I have always had somebody to spend enough time with me to at least open gifts. Before my kids left home, they would spend every Christmas afternoon with me, opening gifts and visiting. Since then, there always was somebody. Except for one year. That year, I was so lonely. It has brought me to the conclusion that nobody should ever have to be alone. Last year was my best Christmas in years. I spent Christmas morning with my "adopted" family which made it feel much more Christmas.
Depression is something I often battle but, at Christmas, it is even more of a battle. This year, though, I have one thing that is helping. One of this nurses gave me a stocking that says, "Jesus is the reason for the season". When I am lying in bed and start feeling sorry for myself, I look at it and it puts things back in perspective for me.
Christmas, at least most times, is tedious for me. Because any visitors I get, don't come until afternoon or evening, Christmas morning is just like any other morning. I do enjoy my mornings. It is just that on Christmas it feels like I should be doing something else.
The very worst time for me, though, is the week between Christmas and New Year. All the pre-Christmas hustle and bustle is over and things settle back into my mundane routine. I don't get out much or get many visitors.
So, you see, Christmas is, for me, like the rest of my life. A combination of good and bad.
Tuesday, 15 December 2015
How I Write My Blogs
How I Write My Blogs-This blog is the process of another sleepless night. I
asked the Lord if He could give me a topic for my next blog. I couldn't
sleep anyway so I figured I may as well be thinking about something positive
rather then spending the long hours fretting about not being able to sleep.
Immediately, I felt to write about how I write my blogs. I know I have
written before about my blogs but, if I remember correctly, that was about
why I write these blogs. This time, I want to focus more on the process that
I go though.
The first step in the process is getting a topic to write about from the
Holy Spirit. I always post the blogs on Tuesday. Then , for the next few
days, it is a matter of waiting for the Holy Spirit to reveal the next topic
to me. I like it best when the topic comes quickly and I know, beyond the
shadow of a doubt that it came from the Holy Spirit. Unfortunately, that is
not always the case. Sometimes, I don't get an idea until the last
minute and I am not 100% sure that it from God. But I write it anyway. I
would rather write about something that wasn't from God than to risk being
disobedient to God by not writing about it.
Once that I have settled on a topic, I like to mull over what I might say
about the topic. In my head, I make sort of an outline. At least, I think up
several points that I would like to write about. But I don't, or try not,
think of specific words that I want to use. For two reasons. First of all,
by this time, I have learned that, when I start writing, the words that come
out probably won't be the same as I have thought up and, secondly, I don't
want to share with you my own, personal opinions and insights. No doubt,
they sneak in from time to time but, on the whole, I would rather let the
Holy Spirit speak to you through my writing.
Then comes the actual writing. Because it takes me so long to write anything, I like to start writing it on Saturday morning and finish it on Tuesday morning. A lot of times, but not always, before breakfast. It helps to make my Saturday mornings go by much more quickly and means less to write on Tuesday. I always have a general idea what I am going but the specific words come as I start writing. Not very often do I have to stop to think about what I am going to say next. Sometimes what comes out is new to me too. Other times, it may be a bit of a rebuke for me. Or maybe it is something that I know but have never put into words. Whatever the case, the next step in the process is also my least favorite. Proofreading. It takes so flipping long to move my cursor around to correct errors. Plus, by the time I finish the blog, I am tired and the last thing I want to do is proofread. But I do anyway, though I probably miss some mistakes.
After the proofreading comes the posting. I confess that I have been too lazy to learn how to post it so I just e-mail to a friend and she posts it for me. Once it is posted, I look forward to reading any comments about the blog. Positive feedback always encourages me to continue on with the blogs.
So that is the process I go though to write a blog. I do need spend some time thinking, in general, what I want to write about or the blog would just be a bunch of random thoughts with no cohesion. But I enjoy thinking about my blogs as it takes my mind off more negative things. The actual writing is always interesting as I am never 100% sure what I will say.
asked the Lord if He could give me a topic for my next blog. I couldn't
sleep anyway so I figured I may as well be thinking about something positive
rather then spending the long hours fretting about not being able to sleep.
Immediately, I felt to write about how I write my blogs. I know I have
written before about my blogs but, if I remember correctly, that was about
why I write these blogs. This time, I want to focus more on the process that
I go though.
The first step in the process is getting a topic to write about from the
Holy Spirit. I always post the blogs on Tuesday. Then , for the next few
days, it is a matter of waiting for the Holy Spirit to reveal the next topic
to me. I like it best when the topic comes quickly and I know, beyond the
shadow of a doubt that it came from the Holy Spirit. Unfortunately, that is
not always the case. Sometimes, I don't get an idea until the last
minute and I am not 100% sure that it from God. But I write it anyway. I
would rather write about something that wasn't from God than to risk being
disobedient to God by not writing about it.
Once that I have settled on a topic, I like to mull over what I might say
about the topic. In my head, I make sort of an outline. At least, I think up
several points that I would like to write about. But I don't, or try not,
think of specific words that I want to use. For two reasons. First of all,
by this time, I have learned that, when I start writing, the words that come
out probably won't be the same as I have thought up and, secondly, I don't
want to share with you my own, personal opinions and insights. No doubt,
they sneak in from time to time but, on the whole, I would rather let the
Holy Spirit speak to you through my writing.
Then comes the actual writing. Because it takes me so long to write anything, I like to start writing it on Saturday morning and finish it on Tuesday morning. A lot of times, but not always, before breakfast. It helps to make my Saturday mornings go by much more quickly and means less to write on Tuesday. I always have a general idea what I am going but the specific words come as I start writing. Not very often do I have to stop to think about what I am going to say next. Sometimes what comes out is new to me too. Other times, it may be a bit of a rebuke for me. Or maybe it is something that I know but have never put into words. Whatever the case, the next step in the process is also my least favorite. Proofreading. It takes so flipping long to move my cursor around to correct errors. Plus, by the time I finish the blog, I am tired and the last thing I want to do is proofread. But I do anyway, though I probably miss some mistakes.
After the proofreading comes the posting. I confess that I have been too lazy to learn how to post it so I just e-mail to a friend and she posts it for me. Once it is posted, I look forward to reading any comments about the blog. Positive feedback always encourages me to continue on with the blogs.
So that is the process I go though to write a blog. I do need spend some time thinking, in general, what I want to write about or the blog would just be a bunch of random thoughts with no cohesion. But I enjoy thinking about my blogs as it takes my mind off more negative things. The actual writing is always interesting as I am never 100% sure what I will say.
Tuesday, 8 December 2015
Healing
Healing-As I was looking up and reading healing scriptures one morning, the
thought came to mind that, even though I have written about many different
things in these blogs, I have never written about healing from God. So I
thought that would be a good topic for my next blog. My next thought was
that I didn't know what to write about seeing that I haven't yet received my
"major" healing from God. But I have received some "minor" healings so,
combined with what I have learned while waiting for my "major" healing, that
should give me something to write about.
First of all, receiving healing from God, of any kind, requires faith on our
part. We must believe that God really is and that He is able to physically
heal us. But just knowing it in our head won't do. We must believe it in our
hearts. We very well may think we believe in our hearts for healing from God
but only God knows that for sure. I do, though, distinctly remember the day
that I could feel the faith for my healing from God moving from my head into
my heart.
Secondly, any healing from God, big or little, must be based on what the
Bible says about healing. There are many promises in the Bible pertaining to
physical healing. However, it is our job to learn them. God isn't going to
transplant them into us while we are doing things other than reading the
Bible. I have been looking up and reading healing scriptures for so many
years that I pretty much have them memorized. That stands me in good stead
when I want to remind God of a healing promise that He has made. I also
know, though, that I can't slacken up on reading healing scriptures if I
really want to receive a healing from God.
A healing from God usually takes time. It is true that, out of the blue, God
will sometimes perform a miracle for some reason known only to Himself. But
that is not the norm. I can't help wondering if God doesn't make us wait to
see if we want the healing badly enough to put in the time and make the
effort to thoroughly learn His healing promises. In all honesty, if I had
known how long it was going to be before my healing showed up on the
outside, I am not sure I would have had the courage for this But God is
smart enough not to reveal things like that at the beginning!
A healing from God takes determination. You must have it settled in your mind that your healing is going to come from God and never, ever give up. No matter how bad it gets. I know that, every so often, I literally have to tell myself that I won't give up, I won't, I won't. I have no other option for healing as no doctor can help me . That fact alone is enough to boost my determination level.
Along with determination, anybody who wants to receive healing from God needs to have perserverence. Barring a miracle, people who want healing from God are probably not going to receive it unless they keep at it. Both praying and reading and meditating on healing scriptures. In my case, I have been doing it for 30 years and my healing has still not gotten to the outside so others can see it.
Patience is not a character trait that comes naturally to most of us. Especially in our fast-paced society. But, by making people wait to receive their healing, I suspect that God forces people to develop the character trait of patience. I still catch myself being too impatient at times but I certainly have more patience than I did 30 years ago.
In the introduction, I mentioned some minor healings that I have received. I have but I have also learned that, after praying and speaking to the symptoms to go and they do, there is a good chance that those same symptoms will come back to try to convince me that I haven't been healed. It is up to me to stand against those symptoms until they are gone for good.
That is my take on healing. Most of it learned through experience. Aside from a few minor healings, I am still waiting but my total restoration is coming.
thought came to mind that, even though I have written about many different
things in these blogs, I have never written about healing from God. So I
thought that would be a good topic for my next blog. My next thought was
that I didn't know what to write about seeing that I haven't yet received my
"major" healing from God. But I have received some "minor" healings so,
combined with what I have learned while waiting for my "major" healing, that
should give me something to write about.
First of all, receiving healing from God, of any kind, requires faith on our
part. We must believe that God really is and that He is able to physically
heal us. But just knowing it in our head won't do. We must believe it in our
hearts. We very well may think we believe in our hearts for healing from God
but only God knows that for sure. I do, though, distinctly remember the day
that I could feel the faith for my healing from God moving from my head into
my heart.
Secondly, any healing from God, big or little, must be based on what the
Bible says about healing. There are many promises in the Bible pertaining to
physical healing. However, it is our job to learn them. God isn't going to
transplant them into us while we are doing things other than reading the
Bible. I have been looking up and reading healing scriptures for so many
years that I pretty much have them memorized. That stands me in good stead
when I want to remind God of a healing promise that He has made. I also
know, though, that I can't slacken up on reading healing scriptures if I
really want to receive a healing from God.
A healing from God usually takes time. It is true that, out of the blue, God
will sometimes perform a miracle for some reason known only to Himself. But
that is not the norm. I can't help wondering if God doesn't make us wait to
see if we want the healing badly enough to put in the time and make the
effort to thoroughly learn His healing promises. In all honesty, if I had
known how long it was going to be before my healing showed up on the
outside, I am not sure I would have had the courage for this But God is
smart enough not to reveal things like that at the beginning!
A healing from God takes determination. You must have it settled in your mind that your healing is going to come from God and never, ever give up. No matter how bad it gets. I know that, every so often, I literally have to tell myself that I won't give up, I won't, I won't. I have no other option for healing as no doctor can help me . That fact alone is enough to boost my determination level.
Along with determination, anybody who wants to receive healing from God needs to have perserverence. Barring a miracle, people who want healing from God are probably not going to receive it unless they keep at it. Both praying and reading and meditating on healing scriptures. In my case, I have been doing it for 30 years and my healing has still not gotten to the outside so others can see it.
Patience is not a character trait that comes naturally to most of us. Especially in our fast-paced society. But, by making people wait to receive their healing, I suspect that God forces people to develop the character trait of patience. I still catch myself being too impatient at times but I certainly have more patience than I did 30 years ago.
In the introduction, I mentioned some minor healings that I have received. I have but I have also learned that, after praying and speaking to the symptoms to go and they do, there is a good chance that those same symptoms will come back to try to convince me that I haven't been healed. It is up to me to stand against those symptoms until they are gone for good.
That is my take on healing. Most of it learned through experience. Aside from a few minor healings, I am still waiting but my total restoration is coming.
Tuesday, 1 December 2015
Food
Food-I like to start writing my blog on Saturday morning so I don't have
so much to write on Tuesday. This time, though, Friday afternoon came and I
still didn't have a clue what to write about. I certainly wasn't stressed
out about it but I did tell God that it would be nice to know a little ahead
of time. The thought that came to me was "Food". My thought, "No way. I have
nothing to say about food". I am still not totally convinced that I should
be writing about food but, as I don't want to risk disobeying God, I will
scribble down a few things. So please bear with me.
Some time ago, I wrote in my blog that all I had left my pre-stroke life,
except for my kids, are my memories. But, like a lot of people who are
getting older, my childhood memories are the strongest. The same with food
memories. I can still taste some of the things that my mother made but that
I eaten since I was a child. One was something called Kooga. I have no idea
how to spell it but it was some kind of German coffee cake. My mother never
made macaroni and cheese. Instead, we always got macaroni and tomatoes. We
didn't have a lot of money so I remember things like sardines on toast and
fried bologna. Like most children I remember best the sweets. We didn't get
a lot of store-bought candy but Mom would, quite often, make fudge for us
kids. Of course, sometimes it was chocolate but, what I remember most, is
the brown sugar fudge. Something I haven't had in years. Other times, Mom
would give us each a cup, fill it with stuff she used for baking (chocolate
chips, raisins, coconut, walnuts, etc ) and let us pick away. Then there
were the molasses cookies. I can still remember coming home from school to
find the table covered with soft molasses cookies. Oh, the birthday cakes.
Of course, Mom would make them herself. Layer cakes. But, before she put
the layers together and iced it, she stuck trinkets in the bottom layer so
that, when we had a piece of cake we also got a trinket.
One food memory I have is when I was a teen living in Medicine Hat. At the
Woolworth store, they had a with the most incredible bananas rolls. Looked
like a jelly roll but was like bananas bread rolled up with banana cream
frosting. It was so good!
My food memory from after I was married was that, if we had leftover turkey,
my husband would put it in a white sauce and we would eat it on toast. Yum!
Since the stroke, though, it has been hospital food, hospital food and more hospital food! When they first started to give me food, it was pretty gross as I had to eat pureed food, very much like baby food. Now, though, I can eat most things as long as it is cut small and not to hard. Most of the food served in Long-term Care is not bad and some it is really quite good. Still, I jump at any opportunity I get to eat different food.
Thinking about it , I can't think of any food that I utterly loathe. Except green peppers. I can't stand those things! When I was a kid, from time to time, my mother made baked, stuffed green peppers. I wouldn't even stay in the house while they were cooking because of the smell! Of course, there are other things that I prefer not to eat but nothing is as disgusting, to me, as green peppers!
Even though I can eat a lot of things, I do get hungry for things that I can't eat because they are too hard. One is apples. I crave an apple. Another thing I miss eating are nuts of any kind. I miss just eating them by the handful but there is also a lot baking that I can't eat because of the nuts in it. Sometimes, it would just be nice to be able to suck on a hard candy. And so on...
As I was writing this, the thought was that perhaps God had me write about food merely as a test of my obedience. He has been known to do that. Whatever the reason, writing this made me hungry. Most of it, anyway!
so much to write on Tuesday. This time, though, Friday afternoon came and I
still didn't have a clue what to write about. I certainly wasn't stressed
out about it but I did tell God that it would be nice to know a little ahead
of time. The thought that came to me was "Food". My thought, "No way. I have
nothing to say about food". I am still not totally convinced that I should
be writing about food but, as I don't want to risk disobeying God, I will
scribble down a few things. So please bear with me.
Some time ago, I wrote in my blog that all I had left my pre-stroke life,
except for my kids, are my memories. But, like a lot of people who are
getting older, my childhood memories are the strongest. The same with food
memories. I can still taste some of the things that my mother made but that
I eaten since I was a child. One was something called Kooga. I have no idea
how to spell it but it was some kind of German coffee cake. My mother never
made macaroni and cheese. Instead, we always got macaroni and tomatoes. We
didn't have a lot of money so I remember things like sardines on toast and
fried bologna. Like most children I remember best the sweets. We didn't get
a lot of store-bought candy but Mom would, quite often, make fudge for us
kids. Of course, sometimes it was chocolate but, what I remember most, is
the brown sugar fudge. Something I haven't had in years. Other times, Mom
would give us each a cup, fill it with stuff she used for baking (chocolate
chips, raisins, coconut, walnuts, etc ) and let us pick away. Then there
were the molasses cookies. I can still remember coming home from school to
find the table covered with soft molasses cookies. Oh, the birthday cakes.
Of course, Mom would make them herself. Layer cakes. But, before she put
the layers together and iced it, she stuck trinkets in the bottom layer so
that, when we had a piece of cake we also got a trinket.
One food memory I have is when I was a teen living in Medicine Hat. At the
Woolworth store, they had a with the most incredible bananas rolls. Looked
like a jelly roll but was like bananas bread rolled up with banana cream
frosting. It was so good!
My food memory from after I was married was that, if we had leftover turkey,
my husband would put it in a white sauce and we would eat it on toast. Yum!
Since the stroke, though, it has been hospital food, hospital food and more hospital food! When they first started to give me food, it was pretty gross as I had to eat pureed food, very much like baby food. Now, though, I can eat most things as long as it is cut small and not to hard. Most of the food served in Long-term Care is not bad and some it is really quite good. Still, I jump at any opportunity I get to eat different food.
Thinking about it , I can't think of any food that I utterly loathe. Except green peppers. I can't stand those things! When I was a kid, from time to time, my mother made baked, stuffed green peppers. I wouldn't even stay in the house while they were cooking because of the smell! Of course, there are other things that I prefer not to eat but nothing is as disgusting, to me, as green peppers!
Even though I can eat a lot of things, I do get hungry for things that I can't eat because they are too hard. One is apples. I crave an apple. Another thing I miss eating are nuts of any kind. I miss just eating them by the handful but there is also a lot baking that I can't eat because of the nuts in it. Sometimes, it would just be nice to be able to suck on a hard candy. And so on...
As I was writing this, the thought was that perhaps God had me write about food merely as a test of my obedience. He has been known to do that. Whatever the reason, writing this made me hungry. Most of it, anyway!
Friday, 27 November 2015
In Everything Give Thanks
In Everything Give Thanks-One day, when I was waiting for them to bring my
supper, the phrase "in everything give thanks" kept rolling around in my
mind. I got to thinking that "in everything" means wherever I am, whatever I
am doing and whatever kind of mood that I am in.
First, let's deal with the places that I need to be giving thanks to God.
The most obvious one, of course, is church. It should be relatively easy for
me to thank God amongst other people who are thanking and praising God as
well,. Most times, it is but there are times that I have to make myself
thank God. At times, through tears.
As soon as I get up in the morning, the nurses put me on the computer and I
start reading the Bible. It is pretty easy to be thankful when reading about
what Jesus has done and is going to do for me. This is my favorite time of
day.
Then I get taken to the dining room for breakfast. The dining room, be it at
breakfast, lunch or supper, is not a place that I am as thankful as I should
be. Even the grace that I do is usually just a hurried thanks instead of
really thanking God for the food that He has provided. I keep reminding
myself that a lot of people in this world don't have food nearly as good as
this but, too often, I still find myself complaining about the food.
After breakfast, I go back to the computer. This time, it is mostly to
write. Mainly e-mails. My thankfulness during this time is rather hit and
miss. Sometimes I do express thanks to God. Especially when my music evokes
thanks to God. At other times, through, I concentrate so much on what I am
writing that I don't express thanks to God or, even, pay attention to my
music.
After lunch, I rest in bed and listen to music. I have learned to listen to
the words of the music and concentrate on thanking God or my thoughts will
wander all over the place and I end up feeling depressed. Christian music is
a real blessing for me as it help to keep me in a thankful attitude. Until I get up for supper.
In the evening,after supper, it is back to the computer. This time,though,
it is mostly to watch tv. By evening, I don't have the energy for much else.
I mostly watch some kind of sporting event. Years ago, the Holy Spirit told
me be praying for those players. So, at the start of each game, I do try to
remember to pray a general prayer for players on both teams. Once the game
starts, though, too often I get so interested in the game that I forget
either to pray for those players or give thanks to God.
One habit that I have had for years is that, once I am in bed for the night, before I pray about other
things or go to sleep, is to thank the Lord for different things during that
day. Admittedly, some days are pretty slim pickings but I can usually come
up with something. When I am awake at night, I do begin thanking the Lord at
times but, too often, I get frustrated because I can't sleep.
I think that it would be redundant to mention giving thanks in everything that I do as I have already covered pretty much all that I do. I will just say this. Even though God is in my thoughts most of the time, it isn't always the giving of thanks. I do my share of griping and complaining.
Finally, "in everything give thanks" must also mean whatever state my emotions are in. It is relatively easy to be thankful when things are going well and I am feeling "sunny". But things change and my "sunny" turns to depression and discouragement or anger and frustration. Then it is not so easy to maintain a thankful attitude.
As I was writing this, I realized that I need, more often, to make a CONSCIOUS decision to thank God no matter where I am, what I am doing or how I am feeling. I say conscious because there are times that thanking God is about the last thing I think of or feel like doing. But I can make myself until it becomes the automatic thing to do.
supper, the phrase "in everything give thanks" kept rolling around in my
mind. I got to thinking that "in everything" means wherever I am, whatever I
am doing and whatever kind of mood that I am in.
First, let's deal with the places that I need to be giving thanks to God.
The most obvious one, of course, is church. It should be relatively easy for
me to thank God amongst other people who are thanking and praising God as
well,. Most times, it is but there are times that I have to make myself
thank God. At times, through tears.
As soon as I get up in the morning, the nurses put me on the computer and I
start reading the Bible. It is pretty easy to be thankful when reading about
what Jesus has done and is going to do for me. This is my favorite time of
day.
Then I get taken to the dining room for breakfast. The dining room, be it at
breakfast, lunch or supper, is not a place that I am as thankful as I should
be. Even the grace that I do is usually just a hurried thanks instead of
really thanking God for the food that He has provided. I keep reminding
myself that a lot of people in this world don't have food nearly as good as
this but, too often, I still find myself complaining about the food.
After breakfast, I go back to the computer. This time, it is mostly to
write. Mainly e-mails. My thankfulness during this time is rather hit and
miss. Sometimes I do express thanks to God. Especially when my music evokes
thanks to God. At other times, through, I concentrate so much on what I am
writing that I don't express thanks to God or, even, pay attention to my
music.
After lunch, I rest in bed and listen to music. I have learned to listen to
the words of the music and concentrate on thanking God or my thoughts will
wander all over the place and I end up feeling depressed. Christian music is
a real blessing for me as it help to keep me in a thankful attitude. Until I get up for supper.
In the evening,after supper, it is back to the computer. This time,though,
it is mostly to watch tv. By evening, I don't have the energy for much else.
I mostly watch some kind of sporting event. Years ago, the Holy Spirit told
me be praying for those players. So, at the start of each game, I do try to
remember to pray a general prayer for players on both teams. Once the game
starts, though, too often I get so interested in the game that I forget
either to pray for those players or give thanks to God.
One habit that I have had for years is that, once I am in bed for the night, before I pray about other
things or go to sleep, is to thank the Lord for different things during that
day. Admittedly, some days are pretty slim pickings but I can usually come
up with something. When I am awake at night, I do begin thanking the Lord at
times but, too often, I get frustrated because I can't sleep.
I think that it would be redundant to mention giving thanks in everything that I do as I have already covered pretty much all that I do. I will just say this. Even though God is in my thoughts most of the time, it isn't always the giving of thanks. I do my share of griping and complaining.
Finally, "in everything give thanks" must also mean whatever state my emotions are in. It is relatively easy to be thankful when things are going well and I am feeling "sunny". But things change and my "sunny" turns to depression and discouragement or anger and frustration. Then it is not so easy to maintain a thankful attitude.
As I was writing this, I realized that I need, more often, to make a CONSCIOUS decision to thank God no matter where I am, what I am doing or how I am feeling. I say conscious because there are times that thanking God is about the last thing I think of or feel like doing. But I can make myself until it becomes the automatic thing to do.
Tuesday, 17 November 2015
Ways That I Depend on God
Ways That I Depend On God-The Holy Spirit inspires all of my blogs but,
every so often, I know that I absolutely have to write about a particular
subject. This is one one of those times. I just know that I have to write
about ways that I depend on God. I am not too sure why but I do remember the
Holy Spirit telling me that God didn't call me to understand but to obey.
So...
The first, and foremost, way that I depend on God is for my ultimate healing
in this life. No doctor can restore me to the health that I had before the
stroke but Jesus can and will. My only part in my healing is to make sure
that, out of frustration and fatigue, I don't give up.
But, I also depend on God for other, what I call my little, healings. If I
complained to the nurses whenever I have some kind of pain or discomfort, I
would be complaining to them most of the time. Instead, when I get a
toothache or earache or some other ache, I chose to pray and the pain
usually goes away. However, I have found that the pain will sometimes try to
come back so I have to stand against the pain, in prayer or by speaking to
the pain to get out of here, until it is gone for good. To be honest, a lot
of times, the nurses never know the pain that I have been in. As I was
writing this, I thought of the times when they were feeding me, something
got caught in my throat and I felt like I was choking. I just thought the
name "Jesus" and it went down. This hasn't happened in a long time, though,
as everyone is pretty careful that I don't choke.
I also depend on God to help me with other things as well. Because I can't
do anything on my own, I have to depend on outside help. If another person,
nurse or visitor, is around, I will get that person to help me but there is
not always another person around. Then I have to depend on God. There are
times I need a nurse but they don't hear me calling. But, if I pray , one
will often come. It is really quite amazing the "small" things that God will
do help me. One time, I got too hot at night. But, because I can't just
throw off the blankets, so I prayed and, all of a sudden, there was a cool
breeze in my room. Not too long ago, I needed my birth certificate. But I
didn't think I had it and I wasn't sure how I could get. The thought kept
coming to me to look in my wallet. So I asked a nurse to look in my wallet
and, sure enough, there it was. These are just a few examples of the
"little" things that God does for me because I can't do anything for myself.
I definitely depend on God for the strength and courage to face each day. What I face everyday day does take strength (mostly mental) and courage. In myself, I know I don't have what it takes. Left on my own, I am pretty sure I would either dead or mental hospital by now. But, thankfully, God has not left me on my own. I really have no idea how He keeps me going but, somehow, I keep motoring along.
I also depend on God to remind me of things. I have always had a good memory but I am now at the age that, from time to time, it needs a bit of jogging. Because I can't do anything, I can't write it on the calendar or, in this age, put it in my phone. When I want to remember something, I simply ask the Holy Spirit to remind me and He does.
I depend on God for companionship. I spend a lot of time alone so it is wonderful to know that He is there all the time for me to talk. Even if they wanted to, there are plenty of times that people are not able to be with me. It is nice to have a companion who is with me at all times. Even in the middle of the night.
Finally, I depend on the Bible which is God speaking to me through the written word. I depend on all the promises God has made in the Bible, including healing. I depend on the Bible to cheer me up when I am feeling down and depressed. I depend on the Bible to keep me company when I am feeling lonely. And I depend on the Bible when I feel restless and don't know what I want to do.
As much as anything, I found this blog encouraging to write. It encouraged me to focus on the ways I can depend on God. And it encouraged me to recall some of the neat things God has done for me in the past.
every so often, I know that I absolutely have to write about a particular
subject. This is one one of those times. I just know that I have to write
about ways that I depend on God. I am not too sure why but I do remember the
Holy Spirit telling me that God didn't call me to understand but to obey.
So...
The first, and foremost, way that I depend on God is for my ultimate healing
in this life. No doctor can restore me to the health that I had before the
stroke but Jesus can and will. My only part in my healing is to make sure
that, out of frustration and fatigue, I don't give up.
But, I also depend on God for other, what I call my little, healings. If I
complained to the nurses whenever I have some kind of pain or discomfort, I
would be complaining to them most of the time. Instead, when I get a
toothache or earache or some other ache, I chose to pray and the pain
usually goes away. However, I have found that the pain will sometimes try to
come back so I have to stand against the pain, in prayer or by speaking to
the pain to get out of here, until it is gone for good. To be honest, a lot
of times, the nurses never know the pain that I have been in. As I was
writing this, I thought of the times when they were feeding me, something
got caught in my throat and I felt like I was choking. I just thought the
name "Jesus" and it went down. This hasn't happened in a long time, though,
as everyone is pretty careful that I don't choke.
I also depend on God to help me with other things as well. Because I can't
do anything on my own, I have to depend on outside help. If another person,
nurse or visitor, is around, I will get that person to help me but there is
not always another person around. Then I have to depend on God. There are
times I need a nurse but they don't hear me calling. But, if I pray , one
will often come. It is really quite amazing the "small" things that God will
do help me. One time, I got too hot at night. But, because I can't just
throw off the blankets, so I prayed and, all of a sudden, there was a cool
breeze in my room. Not too long ago, I needed my birth certificate. But I
didn't think I had it and I wasn't sure how I could get. The thought kept
coming to me to look in my wallet. So I asked a nurse to look in my wallet
and, sure enough, there it was. These are just a few examples of the
"little" things that God does for me because I can't do anything for myself.
I definitely depend on God for the strength and courage to face each day. What I face everyday day does take strength (mostly mental) and courage. In myself, I know I don't have what it takes. Left on my own, I am pretty sure I would either dead or mental hospital by now. But, thankfully, God has not left me on my own. I really have no idea how He keeps me going but, somehow, I keep motoring along.
I also depend on God to remind me of things. I have always had a good memory but I am now at the age that, from time to time, it needs a bit of jogging. Because I can't do anything, I can't write it on the calendar or, in this age, put it in my phone. When I want to remember something, I simply ask the Holy Spirit to remind me and He does.
I depend on God for companionship. I spend a lot of time alone so it is wonderful to know that He is there all the time for me to talk. Even if they wanted to, there are plenty of times that people are not able to be with me. It is nice to have a companion who is with me at all times. Even in the middle of the night.
Finally, I depend on the Bible which is God speaking to me through the written word. I depend on all the promises God has made in the Bible, including healing. I depend on the Bible to cheer me up when I am feeling down and depressed. I depend on the Bible to keep me company when I am feeling lonely. And I depend on the Bible when I feel restless and don't know what I want to do.
As much as anything, I found this blog encouraging to write. It encouraged me to focus on the ways I can depend on God. And it encouraged me to recall some of the neat things God has done for me in the past.
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